What You Need to Know about Relationships and Recovery

If unhealthy relationships are causing you distress and to abuse harmful substances, contact a treatment provider today to discover your rehab options. Treatment providers are available to speak to you about rehab options. There are different types of unhealthy relationships directly related to addiction, like codependent/enabling relationships.

  • Cultivating and maintaining supportive relationships takes time and energy.
  • There was a gap that had to be filled, and I filled it with AA meetings and working the steps.
  • That said, know that you can always lean on your support systems, whether that be sober friends, close family members, our experts at Recovery Care.
  • Learning how to build and sustain healthy relationships is a critical part of clinical treatment because they help those in recovery find the motivation and support necessary to remain sober.

It can take time for a family to realize that they are dealing with a loved one who has developed an addiction to drugs or alcohol. Addicts can be very good at persuading family members that an episode where they were under the influence was an isolated one and that it will never happen again. Unfortunately, it always happens again in the case of someone living with an addiction. Someone in the throes of an active addiction may lie about how much they are drinking, how many drugs they are taking, or even that they are taking drugs.

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Many of the friends you had when you were using may still be in the place that you don’t want to return to. You can form new friendships, and do that, look in places where you know you’re going to be able to find individuals who are healthy and like-minded. Having healthy, supportive relationships also improves your quality of life, and there’s a sense of support available to you when you’re struggling.

How do relationships change in sobriety?

Once we're sober, we're able to start thinking more clearly. We're able to more honest with ourselves. We're able to be clear and upfront with the people we're close to. These are some of the powerful ways in which our relationships are changed with sobriety.

I believe my upbringing was of great importance to the trouble I experienced later in life. My mother was very short-tempered, yelled at me for no reason, and didn’t praise or comfort me. Such disturbances during my early adolescent years were not a good foundation for a stable life. The outset of my drinking was during 6th grade, followed by 20 years of substance abuse. For instance, you may start dating someone who initially says that they’ll be supportive of your sober lifestyle, but a couple of months in, they’re frustrated that you’re unwilling to join them at the bar or club. Or, you may notice other warning signs like frequent lying, constant put-downs, an inability or unwillingness to compromise, and controlling behavior.

Romantic Relationships and Recovery

This isn’t bad—it’s normal to form strong bonds with people you go through emotional experiences with, like the experience of treatment and recovery, but it’s important that these bonds stay platonic. While being in a relationship with someone also in recovery might seem like a good strategy, due to the understanding and accountability you can afford each other, it may have more downsides than https://ecosoberhouse.com/article/should-you-have-relationships-in-recovery/ upsides. For instance, two people in recovery may be more likely to relapse together, or if just one relapses, may cause the other to, as well. Or, the relationship could end, causing one person to relapse and making the other feel culpable, possibly triggering a relapse for themselves. If you’ve decided to get into a relationship while in recovery, know that it’s going to be an uphill battle.

What does a healthy relationship look like?

Healthy relationships involve honesty, trust, respect and open communication between partners and they take effort and compromise from both people.

Many relationships with peers can enhance a person’s life in recovery and help them stay on the path to sober living. Romantic relationships, however, may not offer the same value to someone with a substance use disorder. Today, let’s talk about some of the risks of dating while in recovery. Part of early recovery is learning how to have fun and meet new people while sober.

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You still have work to do on yourself and your illness, so you’re going to have a lot of issues to work through. But if you start the right way, with your eyes open and with realistic expectations, then you may be able to find a rewarding relationship. They were able to be more in tune with their feelings and emotions. They also developed stronger bonds with their potential partners, as they spent more time getting to know them rather than being under the influence.

Enabling behavior can include making excuses, lying, and covering up for you. These types of behaviors are a way of protecting you from the consequences of your actions. In other cases, enabling can involve outright furnishing you with money for drugs or alcohol. Focusing on a new relationship and the good qualities of new love can become an obsession for some people early in recovery. As you still need to focus on your sober goals, such as learning to be selfless and service-focused, volatile circumstances can lead you back to drinking or drug use to cope. Even harmonious relationships have a level of stress that can distract someone from the work of recovery.

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